


Innocence Lost

by DavidB1000



Series: I'd Do Anything For Love [3]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: A bit AU, F/F, You really do anything for love, mildly dark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-17
Updated: 2017-10-17
Packaged: 2019-01-18 15:12:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12390666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DavidB1000/pseuds/DavidB1000
Summary: A sequel to my other stories, Acceptable Loses, and Mind Break, this time Alex finds out what Kara has done, and learns her sister has her own fair share of secrets.





	Innocence Lost

Kara looked up as her front door was opened with a flourish by her own adoptive sister, Alex Danvers.  
“Kara.” Alex spoke, barely louder than a whisper, but Kara heard her perfectly.  
“Yes?” Kara asked.

“Kara. I just found out, Rick Malverne was found dead in his house.” Alex started to speak louder, and she looked over at Kara. She frowned as she realized Kara did not show surprise at the news.  
“Kara, please tell me...” Alex stopped, she couldn't even finish the sentence.

“What do you want me to say, Alex?” Kara looked Alex dead in her eyes.  
Alex flinched slightly, Kara could intimidate J'onn if she really wanted to, and Alex was not exactly as strong-willed as J'onn.  
“Kara, I just want to know what happened.” 

“Are you certain?” Kara sighed. “This is going to change everything.”  
Alex groaned and sat down in a chair. “Did you kill Rick?” 

Kara took a deep breath. “Yes. He was a threat, he knew how to bypass the memory wipe J'onn used. I made the choice. I'm not my cousin, Alex. He'll even tell you how he felt when he killed Zod in a pocket dimension he was trapped in. He fled Earth because it messed him up. Because when you get down to it, my cousin, as great as a hero as he is, he can't kill without it messing him up.”

Alex shivered. “Jesus, Kara. This is something that's going to take a lot of time for me to deal with.”  
Kara sighed. “I understand. I didn't do it out of hatred, or evil, I just did it because I knew there was no choice. He had to be taken care of.” 

Alex frowned. “Okay.”  
Kara looked at the floor, and then back at Alex. “I'm not a God, Alex. I don't decide the fate of mortals. I don't like the fact that I killed Rick, but I know what I did, and I accept it. I hope you don't hate me for what I choose to do. He could have killed you, and if he did...” 

Alex sighed. “I understand why you did what you did, Kara. I believe if I were in your shoes, I would make the same choice.”  
Kara nodded. “Acceptable losses is the phrase Rick used, and it fits him, it really does. One loss, so others can live in peace. I will always make the tough decisions, Alex. Just like my cousin. We are so strong-willed, but we can still be affected by the choices we make.”  
“I understand, Kara.” Alex sighed.

&^&

Many months later...

“Jesus, Mary, and Joesph, Kara, what the hell are you doing?! I was fine with Rick mostly because of what he did to me, but you killed Psi!” Alex groaned.

Kara looked up from the book she was reading, which she put down, which Alex caught the name of, “Seriously?! You're reading Machiavelli’s The Prince?!”

Kara groaned.“Why does a book bother you so?”  
Alex sighed. “Since the same one is one Lex Luthor is known for reading.”  
Kara rolled her eyes. “Don't you dare roll your eyes at me, Kara. I'm your sister, I've known you since you were 13 years old! You can't go full dark on us!” 

Kara took a deep breath. “Alex, I am not going full dark. I am simply taking care of the people who deserve to be taken care of. How did you figure Psi was me?” 

“A brain hemorrhage in a psychic?! A catastrophic stroke? Really? A little on the nose there, Kara.”  
“I figured it was rude if I gave her a lethal amount of X-Ray radiation.” Kara grumbled.

“Don't be blasé! I was freaking willing to go to bat for you for Rick. I could handle that. Hell, given enough time I could have convinced J'onn not to get mad at you for that! But this, this is getting sloppy! Are you trying to put up a giant sign that says. 'Supergirl forgot she had a vow against killing.'”

“I didn't forget, Alex. It's just more selective than you or J'onn, or my cousin want. No one ever asks me what I think about life or death. No one asks me what I felt. They just heaped this rule of no killing on my head like I'm just supposed to follow it to the letter. I'm not a slave to anyone! I'm not a slave to a rule only imposed by people who've never understood what it's like to have others force their rules on you. Things would be so much simpler if I had like family drama I could drudge up to justify my actions, but I don't. I only have myself. I can't hide behind pathetic reasons like most people do to justify what they have done. I have to live with what I've done, and what I will always need to do.” Kara glared at Alex when she was finished.

“Geez, Kara, I'm sorry, I didn't know all that, but look, you can't kill people, because you can't decide to be their judge. You said it yourself, you're not a God. So stop acting like one.” Alex groaned.

Kara snorted and mumbled something. “What did you say, Kara?” 

Kara sighed. “Then maybe it's time I started acting like a God. Since you seem to think me lesser than my cousin.”  
“That is not what I am doing!” Alex grumbled.

“Really? Well, it sure seems like it. Okay, Alex, you want a God, I'll give you a God.” Her eyes glowed with her heat vision and Alex winced.  
“I'll burn the damn world down just because you want me to.” Kara growled.

Alex gulped. “Calm down, Kara. Please. Think of your friends. Think of Mon-El, think of Lena!” 

“Think of Lena, what makes you think I don't do that already.” Kara grumbled.  
As if a lightbulb flicked on in her head, Alex figured it out. “Oh my god. You love her, you really do. You're killing the people most dangerous to her.” 

Kara sighed and looked towards the ground, her heat vision faded out and she spoke in a weary voice. “I fought the feeling for so long, Alex. I was happy with Mon-El, I was, but even before I sent him away, I was falling for Lena, and I did what I did, yes, to protect her. I couldn't let her be injured by people who could use her against me. I love her too much.” 

Alex took a deep breath. “Okay, everything is clear to me now. I'm sorry.”  
Kara relaxed. “I'm glad you understand where I'm coming from, Alex. You would do the same for Maggie. Even if I would hate you.”  
Alex frowned. “I don't hate you, Kara, and yes, damnit, I would. It's just, I've killed before, Kara. It's not easy. Was Rick the first? I just need to know.” 

Kara frowned. “You think it would be easier after the first, but it's not. No, even Rick wasn't the first. The first person I killed was someone you never even knew was a threat, one you would hate me for, but he needed to go. The look on his face when I killed him though, you're right, you don't forget your firsts.” 

She looked at the floor and then back up at Alex. Alex shivered. “Tell me who you killed.” 

Kara smiled a thin smile. “Didn't you ever wonder what happened to Maxwell Lord?”  
Alex gasped in shock. “I...he disappeared, no one found a body, nothing. He just vanished.” 

“Yes.” Kara sighed. “I killed him, and they'd never find a body. I put him where he belongs, as far down close to Hell as I could get without tearing a hole in it's roof. I'm not joking, Kal-El's been to Hell. It's not a fun place.” 

Alex groaned and sat down on the chair opposite where Kara was sitting. “This is something else.” 

Kara chuckled. “Regardless, it's the truth.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed the motivations for Kara doing what she's done in the last few stories. If you have any comments or constructive criticisms, let me know.
> 
> Also, yes, comics are just as weird as you think, because Superman did go to Hell once.


End file.
